Have you ever felt stuck in life even when you know you have the strength inside you?
Today, let’s explore how emotional dependence can unknowingly hold us back, and how emotional independence can set us truly free.
Let’s start with a short story that deeply explains this feeling:
Once upon a time, a little eaglet was perching on a tree branch. It was desperately flapping its wings to fly, but somehow it just couldn’t take off. A boy walking nearby saw this and came closer. The eaglet looked exhausted.
When the boy asked what was wrong, the bird said,
I am trying so hard to fly, but this branch is holding me back. It’s not letting me go!
The boy smiled and gently said,
Dear eaglet, the branch is not holding you. You are the one tightly holding the branch. Just let go, and you will fly.
This simple story shows a big truth about emotional dependence.
Just like the eaglet, many of us believe that people, situations, or things outside are stopping us from flying in life. But most of the time, it is we who are holding onto them.
It’s time to ask ourselves honestly — am I ready to set myself free?
Emotional Dependence — Is It Bad for You?
Emotional dependence happens when we tie our happiness, peace, and self-worth to something outside us.
We depend on:
- People (their behavior, their love, their approval)
- Situations (hoping everything goes our way)
- Achievements (success, recognition)
- Material things (money, gadgets, clothes)
We also depend internally on:
- Our thoughts (Things should happen my way)
- Our feelings (I will feel good only when others behave the way I want)
- Our memories (Past hurts still control my emotions)
When these outer or inner things don’t match our expectations,
we feel powerless, anxious, insecure, and fearful.
This emotional dependence is one big reason why stress, depression, and anxiety are becoming so common today.
Emotional Independence — What Is It All About?
Emotional independence means being free inside.
It means realizing that my happiness, peace, and strength come from within me, not from outside things or people.
It’s about saying:
- I am the creator of my feelings.
- I am the master of my mind.
- I choose my response, not just react automatically.
When we become emotionally independent,
we don’t ride the emotional roller coaster anymore.
We don’t let small things disturb our inner peace.
Instead of reacting instantly with anger, sadness, or fear,
we pause, choose, and respond calmly.
What Am I Ready to Do to Gift Myself Emotional Independence?
Here are some simple steps to start setting yourself free:
Right Thoughts
Choose positive and powerful thoughts every morning.
Remind yourself:
“I am peaceful. I am strong. I am free.”
Stop Blaming the Branch
Like the eaglet, stop blaming people, situations, or the past.
Take responsibility: “It’s in my hands to feel good.”
Control the Inner World
Work on your own thoughts, feelings, intentions, and memories instead of trying to change the outside world.
Disconnect from External Attachments
We often depend on gadgets, social media, shopping, food, vacations, etc., for temporary happiness.
These things are nice, but real happiness comes from within.
Detach from Expectations
Expectations like “People should behave the way I want” or “Life should happen according to me” create pain.
Letting go of rigid expectations is the key to emotional freedom.
External Causes of Emotional Dependence
- Gadgets and Technology
- Substances like cigarettes or alcohol
- Shopping, recreation, movies, vacations
- Gambling, overeating, overworking
Internal Causes of Emotional Dependence
- Wanting everyone’s approval
- Wanting situations to be perfect
- Holding onto painful memories
- Having strong opinions and needing to be right
Both internal and external causes silently create stress, anxiety, and sadness in our lives.
Why It Matters Today
Today’s world is moving very fast.
Social media, competition, changing relationships — everything makes it easy to become emotionally dependent.
We keep thinking:
- I will be happy when I get that job.
- I will be peaceful if my partner behaves properly.
- I will be content when I earn more money.
But the truth is — none of this guarantees real happiness.
True happiness, real peace, and powerful living come from emotional independence.
No matter what is happening outside, I can stay calm and stable inside.
My Favorite Book — The Power of One Thought by BK Shivani
Everything I shared today, I learned deeply from one of my favorite books — “The Power of One Thought” by BK Shivani.
I received this beautiful book as a Diwali gift from sidhant bhaiya ( software Eng. at Cadence) at the meditation center.
I will always be thankful to him for giving me such a life-changing gift.
This book teaches how one pure, powerful thought can transform our entire emotional life.
It’s simple, practical, and truly magical.
If you want to master your mind and emotions, I highly recommend reading this book!
Are You Ready to Set Yourself Free?
Today is the perfect day to ask yourself:
- Am I depending too much on others for my happiness?
- Am I ready to let go of emotional dependence?
- Am I ready to take full charge of my inner world?
You have the wings. You have the power.
The only thing you need to do is — let go of the branch.
Fly high. Be free. Be emotionally independent.
Because true freedom is emotional freedom.
You can Buy this Book
